Life lately

I really got back into blogging earlier this year and then life turned upside down and I didn’t really know what to do. I don’t really post about my personal life here but, I’m at a point where I need to get this out and I figured this might be the best place/way to do it. And apologies if it doesn’t make sense - I’m just following a stream of consciousness with a fog from the flu.

For the last four years, I’ve had the perfect job for me - I get to work from home, with flexibility to work earlier in the day and log off to get nine holes in before it gets dark. The work I do isn’t super stressful but it definitely keeps me busy. I have absolutely loved this job.

Two weeks ago approximately 100 people on my team were invited to join a call where we found out our jobs were being outsourced to another country. I’m lucky enough that I have plenty of time to find something new but the fact that I lost the perfect job, that I loved, took a toll on me. A lot of sleepless nights ensued, filled with thoughts about how worthless I was and what a loser I was. My immune system turned to crap and I caught the worst flu I’ve ever had…which led to more sleepless nights and more feeling of worthlessness because I was too weak to do anything.

I’m lucky enough that I have a great support system around me - my wife is absolutely incredible and has taken better care of me these last two weeks than I deserve. My parents are awesome and I know I can call them anytime I need to and they’ll drop everything to help me. My friends are the best anyone could ask for - my first call after I found out the news about my job was to one of my best friends and she got me in touch with someone at her company and a line on a new job.

I think I’m finally getting to the other side of the illness and the bad mindset and I’m looking forward to the next chapter of life…with work taking a backseat to the parts of life that I love - family, friends and fairways. Ok - I don’t hit a ton of fairways, but I needed another “f” to fit.

Lesson learned from these two weeks - don’t make work a big part of who you are - you can be blindsided tomorrow and lose your dream job. Pour into your family and friends and hobbies that bring you joy.

One more big lesson learned - don’t deal with things by yourself. Even if your family/friends can’t do anything to help, just talk to them. Living in your head isn’t a good place (at least for me it’s not). You need to get the thoughts out so you don’t hear them on repeat.

If you’re struggling and feel like you can’t talk to family/friends, reach out to me. I probably won’t be able to fix the problem, but I can listen. Sometimes that’s all you need. Don’t struggle in silence.

I don’t know if anyone read this but, if you did, thanks for listening.

I’m looking forward to the next chapter and the possibilities that come with it.

Until next time, fairways and greens y’all.